I have been remiss in communicating
with you the last three weeks. That is because I have been very busy
communicating with my Bible Study group and with others. That is not an excuse,
but just the reason that I haven’t gotten this blog out sooner. I should know
better, because communication is extremely important in life. Without
communication we cannot develop relationships, and without the development of
some type of relationship we cannot actively mentor another person. As we have
discussed in the past, relationships are not only very important in our own
lives, but are also important to the lives of other people as well. In fact, it is extremely important to develop
relationships with other women not only in order to be there for them when they
need help, but in order to be able to communicate with them so we can know when
they need our help.
Communication is how we develop a relationship
with another person, i.e., if we know how to communicate with respect and
kindness. Communication covers so many different avenues or methods, and we are
not limited to only one type of communication. For example, we can talk
directly to another person, we can tell someone else to let another person know
that we are thinking about them or praying for them, we can pick up the
telephone and call a person, or we can text the person, especially if we don’t
have time to talk on the phone.
In our technological world today, there
are even more ways to communicate than the previous tried and true ways of
communication in the past. We can now communicate using such things as twitter,
emails, messenger, Facebook, Snap-Chat, Skype and a few others besides just the
tried and true methods of face-to-face communication, telephoning, actual
letter writing or the writing of notes of support that we can send out to
someone when they are needed. With all the latest technology and the ease of
staying in contact with another person, one would think that actual communication
would be even greater than it has been in the past. However, that isn’t necessarily
the case. Today, we often fail to communicate adequately, let alone communicate
to understand what someone is going through or thinking.
Yes, we have all these new
technological communicating methods or tools, but in our fast-paced and often
ungrateful and rude society, these various technological means of communication
have just allowed us to by-pass decency, concern, caring, etiquette, and
kindness. Instead, of taking the time to talk to people and to discuss our
differences or ideas on certain subjects, many people now use these new communication
tools as a quick means of saying hateful things, of posting some political
rhetoric, of showing others how stupid they think that someone is, or as a quick
method of supporting some agenda. Those so-called newer methods of communication
often just end up encouraging hateful words and personal diatribes of communication,
which are often used as a means of telling someone how superior the so-called
communicator thinks he/she is over another person.
In the end the one who is posting all
the hateful words via twitter, emails, texting, etc. is not really communicating
(i.e. they are not allowing for an actual back and forth discussion that allows
both parties to glean some type of understanding from each other or that will
allow one or both parties to learn something new about the other person.).
Instead, some people who are using the new fast and simple means of communication
are actually telling the world about their insecurities, hurts, and anger, as
well as sometimes presenting their lack of etiquette and couthfulness to the
world.
Communication
as a Two-way Endeavor
What happened to just common courtesy
or simple caring about another person? Part of the problem is that we have
forgotten that true communication is supposed to be a two-way endeavor. Rather
than just saying or shouting out what we want to say, we need to think about
the other person and we should want to hear their response to our statements or
questions. And instead of thinking that everyone else should want to hear what
we have to say, we should want to hear what the other person with whom we are
communicating has to say and what their opinions are on different subjects that
are supposed to be discussed. That doesn’t mean that we have to immediately accept
what they have said as the answer to all our questions or as a means of
perceiving the world around us the way that they do, but it should mean that we
are willing to mull over what they have said and then politely explain why we
agree or disagree with their thought process on the subject matter.
Running down another person has never
gotten anyone anywhere and it certainly will not make friends. Many times it just shows their ignorance. Moreover, not
being willing to even engage in a give or take conversation will actually stop
the conversation in its tracks. And, if
the conversation ends in belittling or yelling, either on one side or both
sides, one or both of the two people trying to communicate have just made
themselves an enemy or at the very least have given the other person a reason
to never want to talk to them again.
When God gave us voices and brains
with which to form logical sentences and to be able to communicate with each
other, He did not plan on us belittling, conniving, and ultimately hurting each
other with our words just because we have the vocal ability to do so within our
ability to communicate. But, God did know that all (i.e., each) of us would
have to overcome living in this fallen world after Adam and Eve sinned. Part of
the overcoming of the evil within this fallen world is the ability to overcome
the evil that is within ourselves; such as selfishness, sinfulness, jealousy,
immorality, idol worship, pride, greed, and the desire for power over others
among the many other fleshly evils and sinfulness that can arise in the hearts
of men and women.
Salvation
and Heavenly Bodies
There is only one way to overcome our
fleshly desires and our innate evil and that is through the Cross. We are all
born sinners and can only be forgiven of our sins through belief on the One and
only Son of God, Jesus Christ, who died on a cross for our sins. Christ arose
from the grave and overcame eternal death. In belief on Christ, we can have
eternal life. In fact, through Jesus Christ each of us can live better and more
caring lives here on earth knowing that we will one day reside in Heaven with
God and His Son, Jesus Christ, when we discard our physical bodies in this earthly
death, or if Jesus returns before we die here on earth we know we will receive new
heavenly bodies in the air. For, if we have believed in Jesus Christ as the
risen Son of God who is now in Heaven preparing a place for us, we will never
die again, because we will live forever, i.e., eternally with Christ.
“Our earthly
bodies, which die and decay, will be different when they are resurrected, for
they will never die. Our bodies now disappoint us, but when they are raised,
they will be full of glory. They are weak now, but when they are raised, they
will be full of power. They are natural human bodies now, but when they are
raised, they will be spiritual bodies. For just as there are natural bodies, so
also there are spiritual bodies. … It will happen in a moment, in the blinking
of an eye, when the last trumpet is blown. For when the trumpet sounds, the Christians
who have died will be raised with transformed bodies. And then we who are
living will be transformed so that we will never die. For our perishable
earthly bodies must be transformed into heavenly bodies that will never die.”
-- (I Corinthians 15: 42-44, 52-54.
NLT).
Do you know Christ as your Savior? If
not, you can communicate with God and Jesus Christ through prayer asking for Christ to forgive you of your sins and then being willing to accept Christ's Salvation. If you still
need some help understanding the path to Salvation, please reach out to a
born-again Christian. That Christian can share the Gospel message with you and
pray with you. “For if you confess with your mouth that
Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you
will be saved. For, it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with
God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved.” -- (Romans 10: 9-10.
Communication
is Important for any Type of Active Mentoring.
Whether you are sharing the Gospel
message, helping another person through some trial or just helping empower them
to be able to do something they could not do before, you need to be able to
communicate with them. Good communication requires a heart that cares and is
willing to listen to what the other person has to say. Only through two-way
discussions are people able to listen and learn from each other. The same is
true when it comes to listening to God and the Holy Spirit and then talking to
Him about your needs. And, just like we are to praise God for the great and
wonderful God that He is and for all the things that He does for us, we are to
also be willing to praise our mentees for their accomplishments and their
willingness to learn.
When mentoring another person,
whether it is a friend, a spouse, a child, or co-worker, we have to be able to
communicate with them in a way that does not alienate them or hurt them. We also
have to be willing to listen to what the other person has to say and then be
willing to hear their needs within their communication with us. We certainly cannot
allow pride in ourselves or pride in what we think that we know to keep us from
being caring, kind, and understanding listeners. And, sometimes we have to throw
out preconceived ideas about a person or the subject matter in order to get to
the truth and to understand the other person better.
The failure to communicate with the
other person, i.e., the mentee, can destroy a relationship or it can keep a mentoring
relationship from forming. Yes, communication takes time. It takes time out of
our own lives, but the reward of gracious, kind, and caring communication with a
mentee is greater than we can even imagine when we see the mentee being
empowered to be more than they ever thought they could be.
So, whether you are communicating
with your friend, your spouse, your child, a family member, a co-worker, or
even an acquaintance, please remember that true communication is not only you doing
the talking, but is also allowing the person with whom you wish to communicate with
to talk too. For good communication is a two-way street, and it is also having the
determination to try to understand that other person and their needs and
desires. Good communication has nothing to do with anger, hatefulness, meanness,
or selfishness. Now, go out and communicate for God.
